This morning I woke up with a song in my spirit. There is a worship song that people sing at my church in Ghana, “You are the pillar that holds my life, Jesus you are the pillar that holds my life…” I woke up singing this little tune today.
This song talks about the trustworthy and steadfast nature of God. He will always fulfill His promises, even when it doesn’t seem like it.
Our courtship story has been one where very often (until recently) it seemed like God would not fulfill His purpose. We have waited to be together so ridiculously long that even our closest friends had stopped asking us when Evans and I would get married. It has been hard for them to see so much hopelessness in the life of someone they love. Yep…I said it. We all want a perfect love story, but when it takes longer than expected it almost seems hopeless, and we tend to want to run away from sad love stories (lol sometimes I wished I could have run away from the hardship of our visa process too!)
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands” (Psalm 138:8).
Psalm 138:8 got us through some hard times. You see, three and a half years ago God told us that we were in His perfect will by being in our long-distance relationship, and He told us that we would one day get married. Trust, God still talks to His children, you just have to ask and listen.
But, at one point, 2 years into our relationship after my parents still refused to acknowledge that I was courting Evans…and after we had not been able to see each other in person because of visa issues for 2 years! I started to give up. I started doubting God’s promise. That was one of the darkest times in our relationship. However, it was during this time that I finally went on a fast and asked the Lord to show me again, if He wanted me to marry Evans. I said a Gideon prayer (the account of Gideon’s victory in Judges is a must read and an encouragement to any believer who may doubt themselves or God’s word sometimes- Judges chapter 6 through 8).
My Gideon prayer went like this: “LORD if you want me to marry this man I need another sign, otherwise I’m going to give up… if Evans is my future husband, give Evans a dream and allow him tell me his dream without me saying anything. If He doesn’t say anything about a dream by Thursday, then I’ll know he’s not my husband.”
Now this was a BOLD prayer (please only pray these types of prayers if you are sure the Lord is prompting you to do so, and ask God exactly what to ask for as a sign). I felt very strongly that this was Holy Spirit led, and that God would answer and give me clarity during my time of prayer and fasting.
On Wednesday, the day before the fast ended, we were having our daily talk on Whatapp and EVANS randomly said,
“J, did I ever tell you about that dream I had where your dad was giving me your hand in marriage?”
NOW LOOK AT GOD! It was exactly what I asked for without any prompting from me. Sometimes, we just have to trust God! One year later, we are engaged and…Evans finally got approved for his visa!! OUR GOD IS AWESOME, and He really is the pillar that holds our life.
Whatever God has told you, keep the faith! Even if it’s three and a half years, hundreds of crying nights, and four failed visa interviews later…He will fulfill His promises to you! I was disappointed and frustrated with God’s timing, but through it all I continued to trust Him because life is nothing without God. Jesus truly is the pillar that holds our lives…will you trust Him?
“And Moses said to the people, ‘Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will work out for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent'” (Exodus 14:13-14)